Look for the Glimmers
I don’t know about you, but I’m feeling the stress.
It’s back-to-school time (at least til the end of September).
It’s presidential election season.
We’re all experiencing changes in our lives, always.
The online communities you might be participating in are probably embroiled in sharing criticism & outright hatred.
And now those clothes don’t fit either?!
It’s neverending.
When we mix all these ingredients and put ‘em into the pressure cooker of “never enough time in life,” we’ve created the recipe for tension-filled hearts and minds that explode in conflict.
And it hurts.
Energy flows where attention goes. ~ Tony Robbins
It’s not joy that makes us grateful; it’s gratitude that makes us joyful. ~ David Steindl-Rast
You get to feel like what you focus on. ~ me
Glimmer Moments from August 8, 2024:
Glimmer moment 1) After a slow-working morning, Carmen and I ate at a pancake house in Stevens Point, Wisconsin after a BIG training the day before. Right there, at the restaurant, even before we were served, a moment passed over me; maybe it was the temperature, maybe it was the decor, maybe it was the smell of pancake syrup. I’m not sure. But I was immediately transported back to being 8 or 10 years old again on summer vacay with my parents, eating at a no-frills pancake house/restaurant that always seemed attached to a no-frills motel back in the 70s/80s. Such a wonderful memory/feeling/experience! It was a WHOOSH that lasted a fraction of a second, and I spent the next few minutes trying to pull it back again, if just for a moment longer.
What is a Glimmer Moment?
A "glimmer moment" is a term that refers to small, fleeting experiences or sensations that bring a sense of calm, safety, or joy. These moments are the opposite of "triggers," which are experiences that can evoke negative emotions or stress.
Glimmer moment 2) On our way to the airport, we stopped to walk through a sculpture park/trail. It was a cool, rainy morning (in August, which is uncommon weather for these Kansans), and while the art was mesmerizing, I also noticed a paper wasp nest and a few other natural art treasures amongst the human-made art. It was magical.
Glimmer moments are subtle, often easy-to-overlook instances that provide a feeling of well-being or connection.
Glimmer moment 3) After leaving the park, I watched Carmen experience her very first real-life apple tree. She was filled with awe and that hit a glimmer in me as I encouraged her to smell an apple. We also talked about the scat that was under the tree (deer had also been enjoying the apples, apparently). Watching her joy brought tears to my eyes as I remembered the 3 apple trees I grew up with.
The glimmer moment concept comes from the Polyvagal Theory, developed by Dr. Stephen Porges, which explores how the nervous system regulates responses to stress and safety. Glimmer moments activate the parasympathetic nervous system, particularly the "ventral vagal" state, which is associated with feelings of safety, social connection, and relaxation.
Glimmer moment 4) Then later, another glimmer happened at the airport. After experiencing the previous 2 flights sitting next to men who were every bit 8’ 14” (I swear!) and then experiencing a 2-hour delay on the final leg home (causing me to adjust my dog-sitting situation while still several states away from home), I was miraculously upgraded two levels AND seated next to a small, quiet woman! Woo! And while that’s AMAZING, that wasn’t the glimmer. The glimmer happened as I had just settled back into my very comfy seat, earbuds in, dark shades on (even on night flights, I like to fly in total sensory deprivation), and I commenced staring out the window.
Finally, now that I was on the way home, I felt my body start to relax. My Spotify “Villain-Mode” playlist was playing as we taxied down the runway & soon I felt the engines pushing this “tin tube” upward. The Michael Bublé version* of “Feeling Good” had come on just as we lifted off.
“Birds flyin high, you know how I feel.
Sun in the sky, you know how I feel.”
The sun was setting over Minnesota; I was comfy, going home to my dog, and all was well.
And the music continued as the plane’s fuselage was rattling & shaking through the cloudy atmosphere:
“Breeze driftin on by, you know how I feel.
It’s a new dawn
It’s a new day
It’s a new LIIFFE … for me”
… Dramatic pause in the song …
Then BAM, right at the drop (42 seconds in), we punched through the clouds where the atmosphere is smooth and all is peaceful.
🎶. …and I’m feeeeelin ………. GOOOOD! 🎶
Cue the big band punching the big, jazzy sound!!
Ba-DUM (ta-dish) Ba-DUM (ta-dish) Ba-DUM (ta-dish)…
Seriously, listen to the first 59 seconds of the song for the full effect.
And I smiled inwardly, closed my eyes, and laid back into my wide-ass comfy seat. I was in a fully main-character glimmer moment! And I breathed it in deep to my bones. All. Is. Well.
Your takeaway? Notice your glimmers.
Recognizing and savoring these glimmer moments can help us build resilience, promote emotional regulation, and contribute to a more positive outlook on life. You’re rewiring your brain to see the Good in the world first. To let the tension take its rightful place behind all the Good around us. The more you do this and the more often you share this practice, the more impact it will have on your brain and nervous system.
So pause to recognize the glimmer and then bask in that captured moment, even if only for 5 seconds — and longer is better.
Leave your camera and the temptation to mechanically capture the moment in your pocket and just be right there with your sight, sound, and aalll the senses tuned right directly into the moment.
Watching your kid dancing on stage or making that AMAZING play onfield? Someone flashed you that heart-melting billion-dollar smile as they finally understood the assignment?
Hold all of that moment in your heart and BASK in it.
The sun is coming through the blinds “just so” right now?
HOLD yourself there. Breathe it in and know that all will be well.
And if you choose to share that moment with someone, it’s even better. Just pause and feel it together.
Or you can be all alone in the middle of a crowd for that moment. Pause and let the world flow on as you just …hold… the moment.
And the absolute best practice is recounting each glimmer of the day in a journaling moment; walk yourself back through the day to check for glimmers both noticed and missed. Even if you didn’t acknowledge it at the time, you can pause to remember right now in this journaling moment. And as you remember, you get to feel the glimmers all over again … and begin to just know that in the big times and the little times, noticed or not, your life really can be pretty special.
* For the record, I do prefer the Nina Simone version of “Feeling Good” but I didn’t make the playlist. Whatcha gonna do? 🤷🏼♀️
